"Others may change us, but we start and end with family."
--Anthony Brandt
American Composer, Editor

Today's employees expect to have more than a life outside of work; they expect their life to take priority over their work. Smart employers know this and work to accommodate their employees as much as possible in this regard. Time off to attend a child's play? No problem. Adjust work hours around heavy commute times? Makes sense. Offer a deviation to a work schedule to accommodate personal plans? Why not?

I recently had an employee tell me she was having a tough time one day where she worked and in the middle of a meeting, her manager looked at her across the conference room table and said: Mary, I want you to go home, take care of whatever you need to take care of there, and come back when you're ready. She said she took a few days off to deal with some heavy personal issues, returned to work grateful and refocused-and has thought about the personal consideration her manager provided her every day since for the last seven years!

In one major corporation I consulted, over 50 percent of employees cited they would like recognition to involve their families, whereas most employees in the same organization did not feel traditional rewards that were given in the firm -- such as a years-of-service awards - were even a form of recognition. After all, if everyone gets the same thing-a clock or pin, for example-it tends not to make any one person feel special. A choice of a Weber grill to enjoy with one's family, or a bed-and-breakfast weekend getaway to share with one's spouse, however, might make that 10-year service anniversary a bit more memorable.

With a little forethought, it can be easy to integrate one's family with one's work life. At Hewitt Associates, a compensation-and-benefits firm headquartered in Linconlnshire, Illinois, employees' spouses are invited to attend company orientation. You can hold an open house to celebrate the installation of a new computer system. Or send a fruit basket home after a project is completed, thanking an employee's family for all their support in the long hours the employee had to work late on the project.

I remember one case in which a manager who worked in mergers and acquisitions had an employee who had been traveling almost non-stop for several months. The employee had several small children and the manager decided it would be nice to write them a letter, explaining the great job their dad was doing. He tried to explain things in terms they could understand and stated in his letter that their dad "was like a secret agent, investigating the viability of companies that might be purchased, and doing a great job at it!" A few days later the manager received a phone call from the employee's spouse: "You won't believe how excited our kids are! They think dad's a secret agent!!"

I personally feel it is important to "put back" when you draw from the home front. For example, if you need to ask an employee to work on a project over the weekend, do something to refurbish the goodwill on the home front-perhaps an American Express restaurant voucher they can use to take their spouse or significant other out to any restaurant in town. Such actions are just good business, plain and simple.

For when push comes to shove and employees are asked to sacrifice their home life for their work and career, increasingly employees are deciding to stand up for their personal lives. After all, as difficult as it might be, it is always easier to find another job than it is to find another soul mate.